Many times, an online dating member wants a very specific and definitive answer to their questions about their relationship. It usually can’t be done. For example they may give a few details and then ask if that person loves them. At best, an online dating webmaster can provide his opinion but he should do so cautiously. If there is one definitive rule about love it is “there are no definitive rules.” Everyone’s circumstances, personality and experiences are different. What may be considered an act of love for one, may not for another.
When two people are interacting, their circumstances and experiences are unique to their interplay. When you meet someone, you are dealing with a unique personality that may or may not connect with yours. A lot of American men believe that foreign women all have the same characteristics and traits. Why is this? For example many believe that all Filipina Ladies are docile and gentle. Believe me; they do not all fit this mold. There may be some identifiable traits that seem to fit one culture more so than another, but to believe that every individual from a certain country have the same characteristics is a mistake. A personality develops from many variables and for an online dating webmaster to know before hand what exactly makes two personalities click, especially when it comes to love, is impossible. Think about it. Their environment and emotional experience is part of what makes them who they are, now add to the mix another person with different experiences and you have a formula that may or may not work. Usually time is the only way to be sure if two people have enough spark to explore each other’s personalities to see if they are a match.
When I met my wife, she had many suitors. A lot of them flowered her with gifts. To some this may mean love. To my wife, it felt as if they were trying to buy her affection. When I met her, we spent hours chatting and getting to know each other. In our conversations she once told me how she loved different tea flavors. One day, I sent her a small gift of different tea flavors in a wooden box. It wasn’t the gift that mattered; it was the fact I was listening that touched her heart. So when someone asks me what is important to a Filipina Lady, I usually tell them that listening is important to finding love, but obviously that was my experience and may not be the key ingredient for all relationships.
The best an online dating webmaster can do is talk about their experiences without any guarantees. There is no way of knowing exactly what makes another person fall in love or why they may reject one person over another. This is especially true when we are talking about cultures that are foreign to yours. In the Western world, men may think looks or material things weigh heavy in their courtship success, while romancing a lady from the East, it may be simple words of kindness that wins her heart. There may not be anything wrong with trying to find a focal point in your search for romance as long as you remember there is an individual beneath any stereotype in your search for love. Keep an open mind and find the individuality that exists in all of us, no matter where they are from.
When meeting someone online, it is still prudent advice to get to know them over time and not jump into an immediate romance. Let time be your ally and don’t let cultural stereotypes be your only guide to finding romance – look into their heart and learn who they are, not what you want them to be. There is no mathematical formula for romance. It begins with two people and usually on the road of discovering each other determines where it goes. If all goes well, the best romantic math is – 1 + 1 = one love, one heart, beating as one. How they found this incredible feeling they may not even understand. They probably don’t even care. All they know is what they feel – love
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